Dominance and submission 101

Thoughts Regarding Service

Thoughts Regarding Service

Service is an important part of most D/s and M/s relationships. The term “service” can be applied to both sides of these relationships, but this discussion will be limited to the more obvious service rendered by the bottom, submissive or slave. Disclaimer: I will also be using the terms Master and slave as well as…

Finding a Mentor

Finding a Mentor

There are guides and mentors in every area of life and situation. In BDSMit is oftentimes recommended that those who are new to BDSM acquire amentor but are really never given the tools to find a mentor that is rightfor them. I know that when I first started out, I was quite fortunate tofind good…

Littles,  Middles, and Bigs, oh my!

Littles, Middles, and Bigs, oh my!

I’ve noticed in my many years of being in the “communities”, that with this new generation of kinksters, comes an influx of what some people call a “controversial” archetype… The Little and Age-player. There seems to be a misunderstanding of the littles, middles, princesses, princes, young royals, and even liddles. Some say they are part…

Becoming the New Norm

Becoming the New Norm

Fetish Sex, Kink and D/s BDSM are oftentimes the most vilified, feared and misunderstood dimension of our sexual nature.  For centuries, culture, religion, morality, and family, have tried to nullify all but the most rudimentary dimensions of our sexual nature, and project their own superstition and fear onto anything that deviates from their narrow view….

Worship the D

Worship the D

She was knelt before him, the outline of his cock calling to her only inches away. His symbol of power and potency firm and erect as she grasped his zipper between her teeth. Gently she unbuttoned his pants with her hands and pulled back and down on his zipper easing his pants down and his…

The Daily Struggle

The Daily Struggle

How to help guide and monitor ones S type  One of the very asked, yet hard to define questions about living a 24\7 dynamic are the “How-tos.” How to do this. How to do that. Et cetera,  et cetera,  you get the idea. For me, in my experience, through trial and error,  it is best…

What Makes a “Good” Dominant

What Makes a “Good” Dominant

Anyone who talks about BDSM often spends a lot of time talking about the posers, wannabes, and fake Dominants…Myself included. Part of it is out of necessity. It seems as if every single day, I come across someone who dropped every bit of common sense in the name of submission. These are the people need…

Creating the Scene

Creating the Scene

“How do I create a scene?”  This is a question that seems to get asked a lot, but the truth is, a scene is personal. Limits, wants, and desires are different for everyone. However, these are a few helpful tips you can use to design the scene of your fantasies.  Location, Location, Location Where will…

Aftercare

Aftercare

What is aftercare? Scenes can be both physically and emotionally demanding and intense. Aftercare is simply the care and extra consideration, both physically and emotionally, that is given after a scene. It is also important to remember that aftercare is not just for bottoms, but can be for Tops as well. A Top experiences physical…